1. 45 seconds to 2 minute periods just aren't enough for you, you want to be out there the whole game
2. Whenever something falls you automatically snatch it
3. No matter how many times you scrub your palms you just can't get the smell out
4. After putting one or both of your leg pads on you realize...you need to go to the bathroom
5. ^You decided that it takes too long to take your pads off and put them back on so you just hold it, and you regret it.
6. You've become frustrated because you're trying to tell someone something but they can't hear you through your goalie mask.
7. You often curse at the opposing team, and sometimes your own team, because you know they can't hear you (thanks to #6)
8. When you see your team mate go into the penalty box you say some variation of "shit" and prepare for the onslaught
9. Back when you were first learning how to play goalie that stick felt like it was going to pull your arm out of it's socket halfway through practice
10. That stick isn't so heavy anymore, and you have quite a bit of muscle on your stick arm now
11. The first time you tried on your blocker you had the urge to punch someone in the face with it
12. There's an NHL goalie you model your game after
13. You most likely have videos of that goalie (#12) in action and you practice their moves whenever you can
14. Even though you may not like quite a few people on your team you're nice to them anyway, you know you need them to have your back during games
15. Your bag is bigger than everyone else's
16. You're sometimes asked if there's a dead body in your bag, it's that big. And it really smells.
17. Your goalie gear is often strewn about so it can dry
18. Your leg pads cost more than one of your teammates entire set of gear
19. Upon telling people you're an ice hockey goalie they either call you crazy or admire you for standing fearlessly in front of pucks that can be going up to 90mph. You could tell them that it doesn't hurt at all, but sometimes you don't ;)
20. You've made accidental glove saves but say you meant to do that
21. If your team has two goalies: even if you're good friends you secretly strive to be better than them. There's only 1 goal and 2 of you after all
22. Your goal is to stop theirs
23. Your parents car, or your car, has the goalie decal on the back of it
24. Your parents were horrified when they totaled up how much all your goalie gear cost.
25. When people talk about butterflies you're thinking of something completely different
26. When you see a player coming at you on a breakaway your first thought is "FUCK"
27. You watch Martin Brodeur and Tim Thomas in the goal and wonder how the hell they make saves the way they do
28. You're fully aware that if you tried to make saves like they do (see #27) it wouldn't work in your favor
29. At some point during a game you've gone into desperation mode, and you make some crazy saves
30. If you get hurt during the game you're probably not going to say anything, you'll tough out the pain and finish the game
31. You learned the hard way why two goalies shouldn't carpool together in a car. You now know a truck or van of some sort is required
32. When one of your pads isn't functioning the way it should during warm-ups before the game you're aware you're screwed. Your leg pads are usually the culprit
33. You feel a sense of smug satisfaction when you see a goalie who isn't as good as you
34. However sometimes you feel pity when they're really bad, you remember those days when you were too
35. The sound of pucks slamming into the wall doesn't make you jump anymore
36. You've become increasingly more patient throughout your goalie career. You've learned you need it
37. You've had a goalie coach that doesn't do much coaching
